Kiasuism?

When I arrived in the shore of Singapore 9yrs ago, I didn't feel to much of the kiasuism. Well not until I had a Singaporean boyfriend. It was a rather big adventure & experience. That's when I had personal encounter of Singapore's infamous Kiasuism. After that, I had all the visions of their Kiasuism. Call me racist, call me pessimist. But I'm really afraid of thise specific culture. I don't find it the least healthy.

I recently found out that a friend (who always complain she 'has no money') sends her only son, 5yrs old, to an extremely reputable childplay/nursery school. It costs a good price of just a little 1000S$.
My husband's friend sends his 3year-old daughter to another reputable playhouse/nursery at over S$500 per month.
I met a colleague who did the same, sent his youngest son to a kinderdargen costing over S$1100 per term.

WE joked that this cost more than our university under-grad tuition per year.

All these 'reputable' nurseries/playhouses are what they called top schools. They said that these age are the most important in fundamental education.

Now, what will happened to the children who are late bloomers? Or those not-as-well-off?
Are they doomed to be 'stupid'?

I remember I only entered formal education at the age of 6, into kindergarden. Oh yes, I was a lost kid. Didn't know what I was learning, didn't know what I was speaking. I seriously do not know if that makes any difference. (But frankly, I believe that lies more in my upbringing. My parent believed that if I want to, I would put in full effort) Yes, there were children much 'faster' than me. But after all these years, I did earn a good job, & my degree after all. I attained a degree late not because I was slow, but because I had to earn my tuition funds first.

Has society change so much to be so demanding? Where are all the fun in being a child? Where are the fun in growing up? In being mischievous? Having so much free time that you start doin nonsensical things or learning other things that aren't in the school syllables at all?
I was so free during my childhood days, I spent the days counting the countries in atlas & learned all the countries. Until today, I can place where each country is in the continent or which city belongs to which state/country. (I stopped Geography lessons at 16yrs).

While Malaysia refuse to do 'class streaming' at all, Singapore starts from as early as primary 4. It sounds as though you need to know what you want to do in life from as young as 9! (Streaming is based on previous year's performance)
I wish they could strike a balance.

I have always wanted to go back to Malaysia to raise my children simply for this reason. I remember my care-free childhood days. Or at least, it wasn't as stressful as what I'm hearing. It may so silly to think about avoiding all this by 'abandoning' my husband in Singapore just so that my children would live a 'normal childhood' lives.
People say I'm crazy because "Singapore has the best education system". However, I've come to believe that education does not lie only in the school, but at home too. I have met many well-educated & well-qualified people. No offence but, I'm afraid their parents might have forget to instill manners & humanity in their characters. Moreover, it's proven that well-educated/well-qualifed isn't necessarily intelligent. They just do well in examinations. Some may even have zero knowledge in areas out of their formal qualification, but they believe this is perfectly normal. I find it rather shocking. It's as though engineers will never know anything about accounting. And that, bankers will never know anything about aviation. They're too busy for hobbies.

I do find it sad that society is showing that education & manners have a negative correlation.

Competition is so stiff in Singapore. They have 'express stream' secondary education & 'normal stream'. My poor ex-boyfriend hid the fact that his was in normal stream until much later when I found out by doing all the mathematics. He was so ashamed by the fact that he wasn't in the express stream.

Society can be very judgemental, yes. However, I do not see being average as a crime. Because, brain & intelligence is defined in many, many different ways.

I've observed that society has mellowed down about this matter. But that's because this has become norm. Not a big deal anymore. But people work so hard to pay for such prices. They sometimes do not see the day outside the office. All just to earn the big bucks to pay all this price. So that their children can deserve the best. But is this truly the best? They spent weekends together shopping, holiday far away to luxuriously location & have the latest technology of toys & gadgets. But is this the best upbringing? I do not mean to judge this. I deal with public very widely. I've seen so many sort of upbringing (& behaviour). Some, I find are empty. Some, I find, are sad. Some, I find, are the pride of the nation. Some, I find, are heart-breaking.
Some are great, some are terrifying. It gives me a whole load of ideas of what sort of parent I wish to become.

Whether I can achieve it or not, I do not know. But I only hope for the best & joy in my children. That they would live life without regret or lost hope.

I do have my fear. I am afraid if my children will ever blame me for not sending them to better schools, or to less-stressed schools. I have no idea. I do not if Malaysia will also be entirely a safe place for children, given all the crime reports everyday in Malaysia.

That's why I'm delaying parenthood.

Greatest Culture of All???

Everytime I make a trip to overseas, no matter what, no matter how, I'd always find something rather interesting or shocking in the nation I visited.
I have been on my job for a good 8 1/2 years. Some people say it's been too long, some people say it's a waste of career opportunity, while some people envy me. Frankly, I don't really know what to think of the job I am in. It is rather devastating that I have never made any career advances during all this time. However, I have learned that career joy is what I choose to believe in. Success & achievement is how you grade it. People may be judgemental, but my life belongs to me.
I, after all, did not waste my life away.


I just came back from Osaka, Japan.
Japan, as many know, has always been the most successful nation in the world for a long long time. And, being there so many times, I have always understand the reason.
Everything about it is ever intrigueing. I love to shop in Japan. It's pretty silly to do only that when the country itself has so much to offer. Of course, I will never fail to enjoy gastronomy of Japan. The Japanese take pride in everything that they do, from serving food to providing accomodation and merchandises.
They, as we all known, were the only nation that provide staff to operate the lift in every departmental store, along with all the announcement(I don't understand a single word) & the bow (sometimes to 90º low) when all the customers jolly well knoe how to operate the lift.
And when you purchase something, every item is carefully wrapped & tied with the most beautiful packages that you may see in your life. When it's food item, sometimes, I do feel 'too sayang' to open up & eat it. When it's a consumer product, I feel 'too sayang' to throw away the packages after opening them. AFter all, they were made with care & pride.

I normally go out alone whenever I can. I can look & shop for as slow as I can. Walk however far my feet may take me.
In their culture, there is always bowing & constant responses, be it you the customer or the staff. I normally try to dress to the style of the nation & I get assimilated qutie easily (since I was alone) as I would bow like how they do to me. I would think it to be rude if they display such polite grace & I ignore it all. The only thing I can't do is to reply to all their "How may I help you? or What are you looking for? or perhaps #$%)O(I^(*&^% ??"

I have trouble finding products & places at times, I tried to ask strangers on the road, but it is very tough to get through to them is I speak regular English or if it is any term they are nor familiar with. But what impresses me the most is, although they couldn't describe it, they would seek every help they can or take me (personally) to the location I'm looking for. I asked an executive about Sogo, he walked me there. I asked Takashimaya, the young lady patiently walked me there. It may be near, it may be on their way, but remember, their pace of life is also very fast.
In our culture, some may say (Chinese has such saying), "You think I so free ah? Bring you there?!!??"

I was looking for this specific rum raisin biscuit of ROYAL brand. The pastry staff understood nut what I was trying to describe. She directed me to the information (walked me there) and would not leave my side until I permitted her to. And the information counter, the size of a working table, has at least 3 staff to help. When they couldn't understand me, they try ask another staff who may speak English better. Wow.. they never give up.
And the next lady, still try very hard to understand my point. I still did not find what I was looking for. Not because they couldn't understand me, but because indeed the specific brand is impossible.

After all the shopping, time to go back. I bought my ticket & went to the right platform. #2. I was shocked by the crowd. I simply stand waiting. But after 1min (good thing only 1 min!!!), I realized there is a formation in waiting for the train. They queue!!! 2 by 2, at each door of e train car. I can't see the indication, but heck, just followed the crowd.
I am so amazed. Where else in the world, have we seen such civilization?
My train arrived, I boarded. THen I noticed another: Each alternate queue line entered the train, while the rest waited again. THere is another train (to out-of-town) & they were another queue. Errr... luckily I went into the right queue (Phew!)

We were always to queue when entering public transport & to give up seats for the needy ones. But do we really practice as taught? Giving up seats is simple, as this is personal virtue. But queueing up still depend on public responses.

This is just a shopping trip. But it sure is an eye opening experience. A sight seeing trip indeed.